15 YEAR'S BLESSED & LOVED

Fifteen years is a long time in the lifespan of an individual, by any measure. After all, even a life sentence lasts only 14 years. So today, I cannot help feeling a sense of achievement, a sense of wonder, a sense of quiet accomplishment and a deep joy on completing 15 years of marriage. If I claimed that all the fifteen years were ‘picture perfect’ I would be lying. There were a lot of ‘pictures’ yes, but they were far from perfect! I was 23 when I met Kiran; fell totally, madly and completely in love with him. Without a moment’s hesitation, just 40 days after meeting him. (yes, we got married within just 40 days of meeting each other!) 15 years I have grown along the way & So has he. The road has sometimes been rocky. The path has not always been smooth. But when I look back, I have had more joy and more happiness than I could ever hope to have from anyone else. But the fact is, he has been supportive to me, as much as I have been to him. We have together learnt a lot in these fifteen years. We have learnt when to take the driver’s seat and when to be navigator. When to let go and when to hold on. Sometimes it is best not to say anything and to hold back your words, especially when you are angry. We have learnt that sometimes, when the other person has withdrawn into an angry shell you have to chase and poke and prod and pursue till they come out, yet sometimes you have to let them be. But most importantly we have learnt that if a relationship is important to you, it is worth doing just about anything to make it work and to keep it going. Especially if you have invested so much time into it, spent time together laughing, enjoying, having fun, then you should never neglect it. One should weed out discontent right at the roots. Stamp it. Kill it. Feed the positivity. Express what you feel. Make it grow. Remember that love remains but it's expression often changes - Learn to notice and appreciate the small but endless gestures of love and concern your husband makes. Remember that it is the two of you against the world and not against each other - I am not saying wage a war against the world, against your families or friends but try not to fight over them. Don't make every issue you have with others into a fight between yourselves. Show a united front to the world, never pull each other down in front of others. Remember that if your husband has changed, so have you - Acknowledge what has changed for the better, he maybe more responsible, caring, considerate than before. Remember that every promise may not be fulfilled - We need to let go and not hold on to anger and resentment. Remember that it's okay to not finish every argument - It's okay to pause an argument and talk about it the next day because everything does seem better in the morning after the night's sleep. But it's also okay to decide not to argue. 

 Last but not the least....Remember to talk, talk and always talk - Communication is the most important thing in a marriage. Never compare your marriage with any other - Live your marriage the way you want to, the way it makes you feel happy and content.

 Marriage is meant to be fun - The day you got married, you couldn't wait to begin your life together. Now try to enjoy this life together.....😇👨👩👧❤

LOVE & PEACE

 "Love shouldn’t be chaotic. Love shouldn’t be infuriating. Love shouldn’t be broken to be good or heartbreaking to be art.

 Love shouldn’t be built on unsettling circumstances or a weak foundation. Love should calm down the chaos in your mind. It should lighten the heaviness in your heart and it should be your safe heaven from all the madness and the insanity of your life. It should be your sweet escape. It should be your home.

 It shouldn’t be an extension of your chaos, it shouldn’t be messy just because you’re all over the place. It shouldn’t be a reflection of how you’re feeling or the troubles you’re facing. 

You deserve a peaceful love. You deserve a love that makes you forget about the chaos in your life. You deserve a love that reminds you that some things can be in order. Some things are predictable. You deserve a love that reassures you that not everything in your life has to fall apart to make sense. 

You deserve a muse who inspires you to love more, love better, and believe in something extraordinary. You deserve a love that’s honest and pure, not messy and devastating. "Love doesn’t have to be chaotic even if you think the chaos in your life will never end. Love doesn’t have to follow the rules. Love is always the exception."

2017, YEAR THAT TAUGHT ME FEW IMPORTANT LESSONS THE HARD WAY

 2017, YEAR THAT TAUGHT ME FEW IMPORTANT LESSONS THE HARD WAY

 I’m ready to let you go. I’m so ready to let you go. You weren’t the easiest or the happiest and I’m ready to say goodbye to everything you’ve brought. I’m ready to let go of the parts of you that disappointed me, the people who let me down, the moments that I couldn’t hold myself together and the times when I almost gave up on myself. But what I learned were few important lessons the hard way. You taught me that nothing is ever predictable, especially people. You taught me that family could easily diminish your value in a moment of anger, friends could replace you when they find their significant other, people can lie to your heart and break it just to mend theirs, but most of all you taught me how to stand alone, which will always be the hardest lesson for me, but you proved to me that the only person I can control is me and the only person I can really count on is also me. You taught me not to get too attached to people or trust too much or love too much. You taught me that I have to always guard myself even from the closest people to my heart. But I forgive you for all the pain, the betrayal, the unpleasant surprises, and the confusion. I forgive you for the countless nights you made me sleep with tears in my eyes. I forgive you for making the happy times short-lived. I forgive you for not going the way I wanted you to go. Maybe there is something about you that will help me in the years to come. Maybe as much as I want to forget you, you will be the year I look back on to avoid future disasters or think twice before getting close to someone again or maybe you’ll be the year that brought me closer to myself and that will make all the difference. However I appreciate you as you brought me a lot of blessings. A lot of laughter. A lot of unforgettable moments and people. A lot of memories that will make me smile for years to come. Ironically, as much as you made me feel dead inside, you brought me moments that made me feel alive like never before. You had your way of making up for the bad times or the hard times and I appreciate you for making a few things better. I appreciate you for giving me just enough to keep going, to keep believing, to look forward to what’s coming next and to have faith that the best is yet to come. I’m going to get over you. I’m already healing from your wounds. I’m already looking ahead......

Words Of Wisdom (Letter To My Daughter On Her 13th Birthday) Today u have turned 13years old...officially teenager...This has been the fastest 13 years of our life. You are our first-born. The child that made us parents...The one who would never go to sleep unless we held you in our arms... I still remember the days when it was time for you to go to preschool and you struggled to adjust to a new and strange environment....You have remained fiercely independent and so much more mature than we ever were at your age. Nobody ever told us that parenting was going to be so tough yet so beautifully rewarding. Every scrape and bruise, every victory, every heartache. It was exactly like I was told, "having a child is like having your heart beat outside of your body." .....I wish we could take back all of those moments we were stressed with work or with life and take a pause and just hug you. All of those moments though, the good, the bad and the difficult, have shaped you. I hope one day you will understand how important you are to us, and we really do care. We care about you more than anybody and will always be your biggest ally and most ardent supporter. Know that we will also be tough when needed and that you will not always like us. You will want to jump up and down and scream at us. It will be okay. We will still love you. Forgive me for using the same catch phrases that my mom told me, like, "I don't care what u r doing. If everybody jumped off a bridge, would you too?" Unfortunately, it is just part of the growing up package. As my grandma used to say, When you have a child, you will understand.Trust me you will have only five more years until you are considered an adult. Honour and respect them. These are magical, formative years. You will learn to drive a car, enter into high school, make lots of new friends, possibly fall in love. You will not understand why some people are mean to you. That's okay. It will have nothing to do with you. Look for the positive. Accept change. Sometimes life will be hard, but you will persevere. With each day you will grow and let go of us a little more. You will always need us though, and we will always be there for you. Do not take life too seriously. In any case, work hard and be true to yourself. You are the most determined, focused child we have ever known. Have a big heart, forgive easily, and most important always believe in yourself. We look at you and see ourselves in so many ways, only you are the better version of Us - the version I always wished I was... more confident, more adventurous, less neurotic and so very wise beyond years. Happy birthday my sweet, strong girl. As hard as it is for us not to worry about you when you are out of our sight, I am going to let you go. We wish you the best birthday. We are so very proud of you. Welcome to your teens! Love, Mom and Dad

Words Of Wisdom (Letter To My Daughter On Her 13th Birthday) 

Today u have turned 13years old...officially teenager...This has been the fastest 13 years of our life. You are our first-born. The child that made us parents...The one who would never go to sleep unless we held you in our arms... I still remember the days when it was time for you to go to preschool and you struggled to adjust to a new and strange environment....You have remained fiercely independent and so much more mature than we ever were at your age. Nobody ever told us that parenting was going to be so tough yet so beautifully rewarding. Every scrape and bruise, every victory, every heartache. It was exactly like I was told, "having a child is like having your heart beat outside of your body." .....I wish we could take back all of those moments we were stressed with work or with life and take a pause and just hug you. All of those moments though, the good, the bad and the difficult, have shaped you. I hope one day you will understand how important you are to us, and we really do care. We care about you more than anybody and will always be your biggest ally and most ardent supporter. Know that we will also be tough when needed and that you will not always like us. You will want to jump up and down and scream at us. It will be okay. We will still love you. Forgive me for using the same catch phrases that my mom told me, like, "I don't care what u r doing. If everybody jumped off a bridge, would you too?" Unfortunately, it is just part of the growing up package. As my grandma used to say, When you have a child, you will understand.Trust me you will have only five more years until you are considered an adult. Honour and respect them. These are magical, formative years. You will learn to drive a car, enter into high school, make lots of new friends, possibly fall in love. You will not understand why some people are mean to you. That's okay. It will have nothing to do with you. Look for the positive. Accept change. Sometimes life will be hard, but you will persevere. With each day you will grow and let go of us a little more. You will always need us though, and we will always be there for you. Do not take life too seriously. In any case, work hard and be true to yourself. You are the most determined, focused child we have ever known. Have a big heart, forgive easily, and most important always believe in yourself. We look at you and see ourselves in so many ways, only you are the better version of Us - the version I always wished I was... more confident, more adventurous, less neurotic and so very wise beyond years. Happy birthday my sweet, strong girl. As hard as it is for us not to worry about you when you are out of our sight, I am going to let you go. We wish you the best birthday. We are so very proud of you. Welcome to your teens!                                                       Love, 

Mom and Dad 

Quarantine Has Taught Us What Truly Matters

Quarantine Has Taught Us What Truly Matters

 These times have taught us how to be more loving, more forgiving and more compassionate, what’s important and what really matters. That life is fleeting and things can change in the blink of an eye so sometimes it’s better to say those words we’ve been dying to say, to make that call, to say I’m sorry or say I love you. These times have given us the push we needed to get things off our chests or apologize or express how we’re really feeling. These times are teaching us not to take anything for granted; our family, our friends, our jobs and our own well-being. They remind us to take care of our bodies, our minds and compel us to change the things in our lives that disturb our inner peace or bring us down. They remind us of how important it is to have a home we want to go back to, people we want to stay stuck at home with and may it remind us that we can’t keep running away forever, that we can never run away from the truth, that eventually we will have to rest our head on our pillows and think of what really matters without the hustle and bustle of our everyday lives. These times force us to make long-term changes instead of chasing temporary happiness or instant gratification. These times have reminded us that God still has the power, the final word, the magic wand no matter how in control of our lives we think we are. It remind us that there’s always a higher power we need to talk to or pray to when things fall apart when we don’t know what the future holds, when we’re scared to death and no other human being can reassure us or make us feel safe or protect us. Sometimes faith is the only answer and the only way to get through the things we can’t control or understand. It remind us how to believe or hope against all odds just because we have faith that somehow when the hurricane is over, the rainbow will follow. These times have taught us how to slow down, how to take a break, how to stop running around in circles because at the end of the day, when we were faced with a crisis, everything stopped, everything came to a halt, everything we thought couldn’t wait was postponed, the deadlines disappeared, the rules changed, the priorities were shifted and the show stopped altogether. There’s nothing in this life that’s truly guaranteed and forces us to remember what’s truly important and what’s worth our time. These times have taught us how to spend our coming days being kind to one another, being more loving, more accepting and more compassionate. It has taught a better way to live and reflect on the meaning of our lives and how to make the rest of our days truly count.  

U change and Become more Mature

The truth is we outgrow those who don't appreciate us, who are okay with your absence. We outgrow when they make us feel like we are irreplaceable, we are not worth their time or effort. Those who put us last on their list of priorities. We outgrow those who take two steps backward everytime we move one step forward. The truth is we reach a point where we know who we are, what we want and what we deserve and we are not willing to go back to selling ourselves short again. The truth is we outgrow those who don't show us that they are not invested, they are not glad they found us. The truth is we are capable of giving someone we love the WORLD but all we need is reassurance that they won't abuse it, that our hearts are secure with them, that they won't turn into another lie or another mistake.  We outgrow when those who don't know how to love us because it took years to learn how to love ourselves and at this point we are not ready to ruin that by being with people who make us question who we are or if we're worthy of their LOVE. Finally, we outgrow those who aren't afraid of losing us because they will never truly understand who we are and what kind of love we are seeking!!!

Learning How To Trust New Beginnings Again

I’m slowly learning how to be at ease when things fall apart and I have to start over. How to trust those new beginnings once more. I’m slowly learning that new beginnings could be scary and confusing but they could also be spectacular and extraordinary. I’m learning how to let that fear go; the fear of shaking my stability the fear of the low after the high, how to take a big leap of faith, how to jump, how to just go for things that move my heart instead of always having one foot in and foot out. I’m slowly learning that running away is not always the solution. How to be brave again, how to stick around even when I’m scared, how to go all in without holding back. I’m slowly learning how to let new people in, some people do say what they mean and they come into your life to brighten it up, they come into your life to show you a new kind of love. The kind of love that stays. I’m slowly learning that not everyone is out to get me or break my heart. I’m slowly learning how to reawaken my faith in people and their ability to love and their ability to open my heart again, I’m slowly learning that people can see all the different sides of me and stay. Finally learning how to trust myself again, how to trust my transformation or my growth or my rebirth. I’m slowly learning that all this hard work I put into myself and all those tough experiences that left scars inside my heart or stitches inside my brain all contributed to who I am today. These experiences were needed to sharpen my edges. I’m slowly learning that what breaks me isn’t what counts, but what truly counts, what truly matters, is how I put my pieces back together, how I take all those broken pieces and mend them. I’m slowly learning that things don’t always fall apart to give you an ending, but sometimes they fall apart to give you a new beginning I’m slowly learning how to trust new beginnings again even if it means going back on everything I once dearly believed in, even if it means letting go of people I once dearly loved.